RELIGION AND INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS

When religion interferes with your relationship.

Love can overcome many obstacles – distance, language, culture, political differences, financial and health hardship, and infertility. But can it overcome religious differences?

Here are some questions to ask yourself before committing to a long-term interracial relationship with the person you are dating:

1.How invested in this relationship are you?

Before making big decisions, compromises or changing your life around, it is important to ask yourself whether your relationship is worth it and how invested you are in it. Are you seeing yourself together in the future? Are you making plans? Dreaming of a family? If the answer is no, then I’d suggest taking it slow before introducing your partner to your religion.

2.How important is religion in your life?

If you have been happily brought up in a very religion-oriented family, chances are it is a big part of your life and you don’t even realize it. Is religion something you believe in because it is part of your heritage? Or do you practice because it makes you feel fulfilled? Are there certain customs that you could do without or are you more of an all or nothing type of person? Does your partner share your beliefs?

3.Can you compromise?

If you can’t conceive compromising on your beliefs, you might have to rethink your relationship. Compromising doesn’t mean giving up or sacrificing. It means being in a relationship and making the best decisions for you as a couple. What can be done to make things acceptable for each of you? It can be as simple as practicing your religion privately and not imposing it to your significant other. Discussing about why it is important to you and helping them understand it might help if they are willing to learn more about your religion.

4.What happens if you can’t come to an agreement. Is it a deal-breaker?

You have tried everything, and it is still not working out. Sometimes, love is not enough to overcome those obstacles. However, if you see yourself raising a family with this person, you are going to have to dig deep to try to make it work. It would make sense for both of you to share your heritage and religion with your children and you could see how it could become a problem down the road. Here again, discussing about those hot topics of interracial dating might not sound romantic but they are a necessary step if you are serious about your relationship.

Read, reach out to other couples who have had both positive and negative experiences to get a true picture of what is coming for you and decide for yourself if this is something that you are willing to do.